Thursday, January 18, 2007

FLYING ICE MONKEYS AND THE HOT TUB BIRTHDAY

Billy Clyde hasta go to a two-day conference starting today, so the normal biting social commentary here may be scarce. But there's time to get a few things off my chest.
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I was thinking of all the stuff that's been closed in Austin since this blog launched one month and one day ago. Totally coincidental, but eerie nonetheless.
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Christmas (as well as Christmas Eve and the Day After Christmas) are predictable down-times. Same with New Years Eve and New Years Day. The Dead Bird Crisis That Shut Down The Central Business District, however, is unprecedented the best BC can tell. Creating a brand new holiday to reflect on the loss of President Gerald Ford also seems to be a first.
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Not gonna beat the Austin-ran-out-food deal anymore after yesterday's exhaustive post on the subject. But the airport thing deserves a sentence or two. Turns out the runways were fine. But the guy in charge of securing the de-icing stuff at Austin Bergstrom-International Airport was seriously asleep at the wheel. So the airport higher-ups had to call someone in Houston (Edward) and ask him to send someone (Roger) to Travis County in the de-icing agent truck. News8Austin did an Emmy-worthy job of tracking said truck. The wall-to-wall (or is it floor-to-ceiling?) coverage actually counts as being newsworthy and entertaining by this week's odd standards. Go figure.
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The Legislature has also been moving along at a rather deliberate pace. The only real pieces of legislation that have passed are those "permission to adjourn for three days or more" resolutions that our pesky Constitution requires. They have been quite the rage this session. If you support the notion of very limited state government, then you, my friend, are in high cotton.
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Both the House and Senate are slated to be back in business on Monday. Presuming, of course, that it doesn't rain.
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The Big News today is flying ice. Apparently the only thing more dangerous than driving on wet, cold roads is driving on dry roads that were previously wet. It produces a phenomenon called flying ice, which in layman's terms means ice flies off your vehicle. Sammy and Bob broke this story on KVET (98.1 FM) this morning and generated thousands of calls sharing personal first-hand flying ice reports.
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Dead Birds. Flying Ice. What's next? Dogs sleeping with cats? Armageddon?!
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(Since I brought up the subject of animals, I owe it to you people to direct your attention to the Associated Press story in yesterday's Houston Chronicle about the toilet-cleaning monkey who doesn't respond to sedative-laced yogurt. Good read, if you ask me.)
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It seems like there's been a lot of other closings/peculiar events in the last month (which the MSM is calling The Billy Clyde Era). If this blog is responsible, then I certainly promise to keep up the good work.

2 comments:

Deece said...

Like the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, the arrival of Billy Clyde augurs immense changes in our political, social, and even metaphysical landscape. The birds were only the beginning.

That reminds Your Faithful Commentator of the banner hung on MoPac during the 2004 elections: over headshots of Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, and Rice, it asked, "Why Change Horses in Mid-Apocalypse?"

/just wanted to say "augurs"

Billy Clyde said...

Dear Deece:

You use realy big words and obscure references. You are no longer a big-time gubernatorial or Senate aide, so please start speaking English.

Best,

BC